CF - Chapter Three: Bend Me, Break Me

Chapter 3: Bend Me, Break Me


"You're serious?" Edward growled.

Paula's right eyebrow lifted and she nodded, a faint smirk pulling at the corner of her lips. "I'm very serious. The next three days, she's all yours. That is, of course, if you plan on being here like you're supposed to."

Anger ghosted over his features, his jaw taut with unspoken words I had no doubt were ugly. You could practically see the roar of obscenities stuck in his throat just as if they were a malformed lump that wouldn't swallow down. Oh, he hated her. That much was obvious. But then again, he seemed to hate everyone; especially me.

His burning eyes turned to me, his lip twitching from the ire saturating his body. "Come on," he hissed. He said nothing more, just turned on his heels and headed toward the back of the store.

I sighed deeply, swallowing back the anxiety. I begrudgingly followed, but stopped after taking several steps, turning back around to look at Paula. She was still there, still watching. I wasn't sure in that moment who she was trying to torture more, him or me, and she didn't even know me. I'd have to ask Renee later if she did something to piss her off.

I shot her a pained expression, well, more a pleading one. I was desperate here. I mean, anyone but him. I'd even tag along with strawberry blonde and listen to the art of blow jobs in a store closet over this, because I was sure in three days time that one of us, meaning Edward and I, wasn't making it out alive.

"You'll be fine, Bella," she told me, giving me a warm smile. "I think training you is just what Edward needs." She started turning around, but stopped short. "Oh, and if he tries to make you do any heavy lifting, which I'm fully aware you aren't supposed to be doing, let him know you have restrictions."

There it was again, the reminder of my fragility. I narrowed my eyes at her – she was coddling me, though technically she was right about the heavy lifting. I hated that I wasn't "normal". I mean, really, there were transplant patients running marathons, doing things every day that healthy people did. So how was that particular strain on a body any different than lifting something heavy? Maybe I was naïve, maybe I was wrong, but strain was strain in my book, and I knew my hard limits, what I could handle. And I seriously hated that I had to defend my ability to handle.

It wasn't her fault, I knew that, but I hated that people looked at me with pity, indulged me with too much care and sensitivity because I had a bad heart and it had been replaced by someone else's. That's why I put up a fight with Renee and Charlie to attend gym, though it was only agreed upon between us and the school that I participate in nothing strenuous – which basically meant I'd spend the majority of my time as a bench ornament.

I'd only wanted a semblance of normalcy instead of being branded the weak girl whose new heart was possibly animal. I had to laugh at that. Teenagers could be idiots.

But the need for normalcy, to be normal, it's why I pushed myself above the limits I was confined to. I wanted to live, because only God knew how much time on this earth I had left, and if I were to go with statistics, it wasn't all that long. When the time came, I wanted to feel no remorse for missing out on living. I wanted to be able to say I did what I wanted to. No regrets. So, yeah, I participated in gym today. And yeah, admittedly, it might have partially been out of rebellion, but I wanted to prove I could do it. I wasn't a timid, breakable doll, though Renee would probably shit herself if she knew I managed to sneak by and play dodge ball. You gotta love substitutes.

So I held my tongue, deciding I'd get through the next three days no matter what. I resigned myself to only talking to him if I absolutely had to. Yeah, I could do my job with as little talking as possible. It shouldn't be too hard because he didn't seem to be the talkative type unless he was verbally abusing someone, anyway.

I nodded my head and started down the path that Edward took. I ended up finding him in the back room near the time clock.

He forcibly slammed his timecard down inside the slot, then shoved it back in the holder beside it where the other timecards sat. I stepped around him, casually glancing at the names on the cards to see if I had one. I didn't.

"What are you doing just standing there?" he spat.

My head snapped in his direction, catching his angry gaze immediately. "I was looking for my timecard. I don't see one there with my name on it. I should probably have one since I'm an employee, right? I'll need to punch in like everyone else. Maybe I should ask for one." Jesus, what was I doing? Here I was already breaking the barely speaking to him rule, and I basically just asked him a question and explained in detail what I was doing. I had no idea why I did this. My mouth opened and words spilled out before my brain had time to register I was even speaking.

He shook his head. "Let's go. The sooner I get this shit over with the happier I'll be."

"Asshole," I whisper/growled.

"What was that?" he asked. His voice was eerily calm then, but the look within his eyes showed anything but calm. There was a thunderous storm brewing there. The green of his irises were like liquid fire, ready to burn and obliterate anything it touched, reminding me of that mythological creature, Medusa, but without the snake hair and stone thing.

I was determined to get this night over with without incident, and throwing insults back and forth or arguing would not be without incident. He was still an asshole, though. At least my inner voice had no worry of holding back the words.

"After you." I motioned with my left hand.

He grunted or whatever the hell the noise was that filtered off his lips, put on his smock and handed me one off a nearby shelf – which I put on, though I hated the shit brown color - then started toward the entryway back into the store area. I followed behind him, keeping a few feet distance between us. We ended up stopping in the cereal aisle in front of a cart that held boxes.

He reached into the pocket of his smock, pulling out two pairs of scissors. He sat one down on the box closest to me, then thrust the other into the tape that bound the top box closed, shredding its hold over the box so he could open it. I watched him curiously, wondering why he used scissors instead of a box cutter. Of course I had to verbalize the question, once again breaking my rule. "Why do you use scissors instead of a box cutter?"

I mentally chastised myself for doing so, but eased up on myself when he didn't answer. I just brushed it off as an involuntary reaction that didn't count if he didn't respond back. Stupid, yeah, but it worked for me. Apparently, though, he must have heard my inner musings because he decided five minutes after I asked the question he'd grace me with an answer. "If you aren't eighteen, then you don't get a box cutter. That's the bullshit rules. Now quit standing there and help me out." He pointed toward the boxes, but kept his eyes on the box he was working out of. "Everything on that cart goes in this aisle." He finally lifted his head to look at me, smug expression upon his face. "You think you can handle that much, or do I need to perform a demonstration?"

"Yeah, wise master of the boxes," I scoffed, the words hitting the air before I had time to put the brake on them and realize I was vocalizing them rather than just thinking them. "I think I can handle it."

"What did you just call me?" he asked in a biting tone.

So much for going without incident.

"Look, I-"

My words caught in the back of my throat the moment he stalked toward me, placing his body just inches from mine. The cart of boxes was directly behind me, he was directly in front of me, so there was no chance of moving away from him. He was so close now, so close that I could feel his breath on my face, warming my skin, and smell cologne mixed with the faint scent of cigarette smoke. His lips pulled up into a half smirk, eyes blazing into mine.

"You've got a smart mouth, new girl-" He paused, his smirk growing. "Maybe someone should show you what to do with it."

My eyes widened, my face flushed from his words and the proximity of his body to mine, and I struggled to formulate a response, but before I even had a chance to say anything once my brain pushed through being muddled, I heard a voice to the left of me.

"Is there a problem, Edward?" It was Paula.

He kept his eyes on me when he answered her. "There's no problem. I was just explaining to, uh… to…"

"Bella," Paula supplied.

"Yeah, Bella." He finally took his eyes off me as he moved a step back and glanced in her direction, speaking in a clipped tone. "I was showing Bella here how to unload the boxes."

She stared at him incredulously, but apparently decided not to challenge him. "Good. You do that." She shifted her eyes from him to me. "Let me know if you have any problems, Bella."

"Uh… thanks," I told her. "But I'm fine."

She nodded. "Okay, well, I'll let you get back to work."

I turned around quickly, reaching for the scissors that were obviously meant for me, and began opening one of the boxes. I didn't bother to look up when Edward moved past me toward the box he'd already been working on. My body was still reeling from what happened between us before Paula interrupted, so the less I acknowledged him the better I'd be. I closed my eyes, inhaling a deep breath to calm my traitorous body. I didn't like the way he made me feel. It was so damn confusing because my mind screamed to stay away, but my heart said something different. I'd never felt so out of control of myself and it was almost suffocating.

I had no idea how I'd make it through the rest of the night, let alone two more days with him. Luckily, for today, I was granted some Edward downtime. He only spoke to me twice more the remainder of our shift.

-OO-OO-

After I pulled into the school parking lot, driving the red bomb, I spotted Alice getting out of the passenger seat of a silver Volvo. I grabbed my book bag, then hurriedly climbed out of my truck and began walking toward her. She spotted me immediately.

"Hey, Bella," she beamed.

"Hey, Alice," I smiled back. Just as I neared her, the driver's side door opened and out stepped none other than Edward Cullen.

He glared in my direction, then slammed the door of his car and started toward the school doors.

"Asshole," I muttered under my breath. Why the hell did he get under my skin so much?

"So," Alice began, her words interrupting my staring after Edward. "I heard you work at Higgenbotham's, which ironically is where Edward works."

"Yeah, I know," I answered dryly. "But I don't just work there. My parents own it."

"Yeah," she said, nodding. "I've heard." We headed for the school doors and were just walking inside when she started speaking again. "You can obviously tell Edward isn't… uh… real nice to people." I hmphed in agreement. "Dad was asking Edward how work went during dinner. He didn't really expect him to answer because normally Edward doesn't, but dad tries, you know? Edward normally just grunts, throws insults at us or gets up and leaves the table, but he actually spoke last night."

"Is that right?"

"He mentioned the new girl he was stuck training, though his words were a little more colorful."

"I can imagine," I said through gritted teeth. She sighed beside me, and instinctively I glanced at her, meeting her eyes, seeing some kind of emotion reflecting back. What was that? Hope? I shrugged it off, sure I was misinterpreting. "Well, I'm glad I could help with a topic for dinner conversation, even if I wasn't present."

She stopped walking and turned to face me, sadness overcast her features. "You don't understand, Bella. Edward doesn't talk about work. He doesn't talk about anything that has to do with himself. I mean, not since-" She paused. "He just doesn't do it. Not even to the girls he, well, you know. Oh, he talks to Jasper and Emmett. He acts like everything's fine to his guy friends, though he doesn't hide his short temper from them, but it's easy because they don't care about being personal with him. It's all sports and sex for the most part.

"But his family, he punishes us. The idea of family now, well, that's something he wants no part of. It's a reminder to him. He's awful to us all, but more so to my mom. He wants nothing to do with her, and it breaks her heart. Sometimes I really think he hates us. But last night he mentioned being stuck training you. He said something about you having a smart mouth, but that was it."

Honestly, I was curious why she was telling me this, what it was that she wasn't telling me about Edward and if Edward never really talked about anything that pertained to him, why he chose to last night and involve me. Yeah, I was definitely curious, but I didn't want her to know that, so I acted uninterested.

"Really?" My tone was sarcastic. "I never would have guessed he's less than cordial all the time. But then, I guess you don't really need manners and good communication skills to coax someone into a supply closet, do you?"

Her brow furrowed in confusion. "What?"

I opened my mouth, but felt a pang of guilt for what I'd said to her. Regardless of how I felt toward Edward, nothing he did was her fault, and I didn't need to involve her or disrespect him in front of her. "It's nothing." I shook my head, then smiled at her, once again moving down the halls toward our lockers. "So, you ready for that big Spanish test?"

She chuckled. "Honestly, no. I'm not that good at Spanish, but I did study."

"You'll do fine," I assured her.

By the time we reached my locker, she was in full blown Alice mode again. Not a hint of the sadness I'd seen minutes before was left upon her face. I barely knew her, but I liked Alice, and I liked seeing her happy. I had a feeling she didn't have much to be happy about when she was home.

And, of course, that led me to wondering why. English went by in a blur because I spent the majority of the time trying to imagine what could have been so bad to make Edward turn out the way he did, for him to shun his family like that. And his poor mom, why did she get the brunt of it? I wanted to ask Alice, I wanted to know, but it really wasn't any of my business.

I hated that I wanted to figure Edward out. There he was, this mysterious puzzle, and I, for some strange reason, wanted to learn every piece. Something in my heart told me to. But I was a stupid girl, and my heart was a stupid muscle. And unfortunately for me, that stupid muscle seemed to overpower my brain these days.

The bell rang, ending first period, and I immediately felt anxious. Second period meant Government, and that meant class with Edward. It shouldn't be any big deal, right? He sat across the room, we didn't talk, but the fact that he was right there in the same room, well, that was too close.

I had that nagging feeling in my heart, but I tried to squash it. He was a distraction, one I didn't need. And, really, I didn't even like him. I shouldn't give a shit about him. He certainly didn't give a shit about me.

But there it was, the curiosity to know about him as soon as he walked through that classroom door. I tried not to stare at him. I certainly didn't want him to see me looking at him, and I had a feeling he'd use it as ammunition somehow if he caught me. But I couldn't look away. Stupid interfering heart.

I don't know what I expected to happen, honestly. Maybe his secrets would reflect off his skin and become visible for me like an open book; I'd actually be able to read him. Silly notion, yeah, but I was curious if he wore on the outside whatever changed him into the person he'd become, because from what I'd gathered from Alice, he wasn't always this way. And I wondered if maybe no one noticed because they didn't care to.

He didn't look in my direction, at least not until he sat down. I turned my head slightly, trying to make it appear as if I were staring at something other than him. But I was still looking, and I could see he was watching me too. And the way he looked at me, it wasn't anger I saw in his eyes. There was something else there. But the moment I didn't hide that I was looking at him, which wasn't actually intentional – I was trying to understand what I was seeing - his face turned angry. My breathing hitched, and my heart started pounding in my chest as a result of the animosity directed at me from across the room. I immediately turned away and faced the front, never once looking at him the remainder of class.

How could one person carry around that much anger?

In Trig and Spanish I was actually able to relax. But my mind still wandered, and I had to force myself to concentrate.

The test in Spanish was fairly easy. Even Alice was sure she'd passed. By the cat calls or whatever they were behind her and me, I'd say others felt the same as we did. Alice and I laughed at them. It was nice not feeling so wound up with tension.

After class, we headed straight to the cafeteria. I was laughing at something Alice had said pertaining to Mike Newton and speedo padding, but the laughter caught in my throat when I glanced at our table, seeing Edward there with Emmett and some of the others, minus Jasper who was home sick.

I didn't want to sit there across from him, but if I, metaphorically speaking, tucked my tail between my legs and scurried away, he'd know that he intimidated me somehow, and I wasn't willing to let that happen.

So I went through the lunch line, grabbing a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and juice, then held my head high as I strolled over to the table. I smiled at everyone except Edward and took my seat beside Alice.

"So, Arizona," Mike started, calling me by the nickname he'd given me. "You think you did as good as the rest of us on that Spanish test."

I took a sip of my juice, then responded. "I think so. I actually expected it to be more extensive or something. It didn't have nearly as much on it as I thought there'd be."

"True," he agreed.

Edward made some inaudible noise from his corner of the table, but I ignored him.

"I, for one, think I actually passed." Alice glanced between me and Mike. "I really didn't think I would."

"See, I told you that you had nothing to worry about," I laughed. I took a bite of my sandwich just as Ben Cheney and Angela Webber joined us.

"It's so cold outside," Angela whined. "I really need to move somewhere warmer."

"Move to Arizona," Mike chimed in, laughing.

She placed her tray on the table, then faced me. "You're from Arizona, Bella. Is it always warm there? I mean, it's got to be better than this."

I chuckled. "Most the time, but it's dry heat."

"Do you miss it?" Alice asked.

"Yeah, I do. It's home."

"So why'd you move here, then?" I glanced from Alice toward the voice asking the question. It was Emmett. Rosalie sat beside him, scowling in my direction.

"I really didn't have a choice," I explained. "My mom's uncle retired and left the store to her, and it wasn't exactly possible for her to commute back and forth living in Arizona. It was a good opportunity for them, and my mom sort of felt an obligation to accept because it was her uncle. There wasn't any other family to leave the store to, and the idea of it being run by someone other than family, well, he wasn't okay with that. So here I am."

"There you are," Mike mimicked in a low voice, winking while giving me a smile that I assumed was meant to be sexy.

It wasn't.

"So you have no other family?"

I shook my head. "No, but I think Uncle Bart would have asked my mom anyway."

"Does that mean you're an only child, then?"

"If I lived somewhere I loved with decent weather, I wouldn't move for anything. Not even money. I mean, it's Arizona. Hello, they've got money there too. I bet that's how you feel, huh?" Jessica was sweet and all, but her knack for being naïve grew tiresome sometimes. All you could do was basically smile and nod.

"Did your parents force you to work there?"

I looked at each of their faces as the questions continued, feeling like a marionette whose strings were being yanked in all different directions. They all seemed to want something from me – which happened to be the answers to the plethora of questions they were firing at me. Why the sudden interest in me? And honestly, I didn't like it very much, being put on display, because that's exactly how I felt. I felt like I was on display, and they were all ravenous for some kind of insight into who I was.

"You actually work at the store you own?" It wasn't exactly asked pleasantly, but the fact that Rosalie spoke to me at all was shocking.

"Well, yeah, but I wasn't forced. I wanted to."

Her eyes widened, and she gaped at me like I'd lost my mind. "You wanted to work? Why?"

I actually laughed at her response. "I wanted to make my own money. My parents, they'd give me money if I asked. Honestly, because I'm an only child, they'd spoil me, but it always comes with a price. See, sometimes they forget I'm not a child anymore. Sometimes they think I need to be handled like I'm breakable. I'm not, I just… I want to show them I'm as capable as anyone my age. I can have responsibilities and manage them. I can make my own money and take care of myself."

She smirked. "So it's a rebellion thing."

I shrugged, and she actually laughed. Not a tiny chortle, but a full blown, throaty laugh. Rosalie Hale actually laughed at me. Hmmm… maybe Hell had frozen over.

Alice clapped her hands together, giggling. "Well, well. Who would have thought Bella Swan was such a rebel? You certainly had me fooled."

All the commotion about me, all the questions, I became comfortable, which was stupid on my part. It was stupid because I'd actually forgotten for that short amount of time that Edward Cullen was sitting at my table. But Edward wouldn't be Edward unless he reminded me of his presence, reminded me that that hateful tongue of his always waited for its moment to strike.

"Let's leave Bella alone, guys. She's answered enough." I smiled at Alice for her rescue.

"Wait a minute. Everyone else got to ask the new girl something, I may as well join in the fun." The moment I heard him speak in that lethal voice that masqueraded as gentle as silk, my body tensed. And while everyone else was awed that he was even participating, I knew he was doing it to get a rise out of me. Karma was cruel, because obviously my mistake in allowing him to catch me staring at him earlier was coming back to haunt me. He was cashing in on that ammunition. But I wasn't going to buckle. I'd let him ask his question and I'd answer it. He wasn't going to break me no matter what he said.

He leaned forward and smiled at me. To anyone but me it would seem genuine. "I'm just curious about your fascination with turtlenecks. You wear them… every day. No one wears turtlenecks every day, well, not unless they're trying to hide something. You can't seem to stand the idea of skin showing with the way you yank the collar up when it starts falling. So is that it? Are you trying to hide something, Bella?" He didn't even wait for me to speak, sneeze or anything in response before he continued. "I'd wager a guess that that's exactly what it is."

My throat tightened, body going cold and numb. I felt weighted down, like someone was holding me under water and I was drowning. Tears stung at the corner of my eyes, and as much as I didn't want them falling, I knew they would. Of all the things to ask, he had to go there. Of course he would, because some how he could see my weaknesses, see deep down inside to what could hurt me. It was like my scar was visible to him, like the heart in my chest that wasn't really mine spoke to him. And if I'd been lucid enough, I'd have recognized the fact that he wouldn't notice this about me unless he'd been paying close attention. But all I could focus on was that I was wrong, so very wrong, because in that moment Edward Cullen broke me.